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1

Wednesday, March 28th 2012, 6:26pm

Official Boozeception GUIDE

To be moved into the Agriculture section upon release of 1.90

Hi ho folks and welcome back to another round of Super Mondy Night Brewbat.
The first match is between the "99er Club of ol' Scottsbeer" and the current Coffein-League-Champion "The Coffeenators".
And withotu further hesitation, we'll go right into the action!

The pitgirls are in the arena, spreading the StoneMugs around, placing Booze-Barrels on Scaffolds and preparing the nearby CropFarms for harvest.
For all those who just turned their TVs on, keep in mind to exclusively buy your Booze-Barrels for personal use on our dedicated SMNB-Store, crafting them yourselves with a piece of RubberWood, sandwhiched between two Planks is NOT healthy and even less recommended. Exspecially not for kids.
Of course, same applies to our 7-ton-SmoothStone-Mugs.

And there the match starts, the bots are on the move and the teams are manning the lanes & farms.
Oh, we can spot the team leader of the Scottsbeer harvesting their Hops crop with an amazing PileDriver-move. I've never seen such an excellent harvesting maneuver, these guys know how to get the harvest done. The Coffeenators sent two man to their crops and even if their technique is much more lacking, those two guys can definitely keep up with their Coffee Harvest.
And there the Macerators start running, frying nearby bots and processing the Coffee Beans harvested by ur challengers, whilst the secondary flank of the Scottsbeer are still harvesting enough Wheat to get their Beer-nilator rollin.

Next up we can see both teams preparing their drinks in a speed, hell, you can see we're in the pro league of SMNB, this speed!
Whilst the Coffeenators are still busy mixing up WaterCells with CoffeePowder into their StoneMugs, the Scott... Oh, look at that, it appears they're having a slight fight over the Beer recipe?! Now, dear listeners, you can clearly understand the matter, with a possible variance of OVER 200 possible recipes and sorts, I couldn't possibly agree with myself either.
Though, now they seem to have settled for a balanced and traditional 1:1 mix ratio of Hops and Wheat, I must say, I love that classic Beer. Still, a strong 4:1er is quite a hit to the enemy team as well, thouh that's dangerously close to the 5:1 potentially killing yourself with a WAY too high concentration of alcohol. As well, they seem to have picked an average solid-liquid ratio, resulting in a total ratio of 1:1:2 (Hops:Wheat:Water). I personally prefer the thick 2:1 stuff, but that's clearly a personal like. Given everything up to 4:1 is actually drinkable in that regard.
Now it's time to push the lanes, our dear Scottsman, given the Beer will need quite a good amount of time to ferment into good Ale. On the other side of the map, the Coffeenators are busy "smelting" their ColdCoffee into refreshing and really HOT DarkCoffee. Some say only the weak need to heat up their coffee, I say... OMG! DID YOU SEE THAT! AMAAAAAAZING move of the Coffeenators, a combined DarkCoffee-Milk-Sugar-Combo taking out THREE of the Scottsbeer AT ONCE! TRIPLE KILL!
I think that's it, I can't see how the Scotsbeer could even try to recover from that hit. Their Beer isn't even fermented past the second stage and now they didn't even have time to slam the Treetaps into the BoozeBarrels to fill their StoneMugs via rightclicking... and with 3man down...
The Coffeenators clearly have won!

As well, special report about "Club Rumisgood Odin":
Due to the enourmous amount of fan deaths, caused by attempts to self-brew the team's favoured "Big Ol' Rum" recipe by simply throwing Reeds into BoozeBarrels, the team was sued to 3 billion USD, effectively ruining them. They seriously should have told their fans Rum takes long to ferment, exspecially longer the more you put into a Barrel at once.
Greetz,
Alblaka

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