I've run a bunch more cycles with the auto-startup breeder, and found that the temp CAN vary slightly... it is either at 9270 with buckets disappearing almost immediately, or at 9520 with buckets sitting in it a second before going. So the syncing isn't exact... but for the purposes of this breeder it seems to be fine. There's a reasonable safety margin (auto-shutoff kicks in at 11k, reactor doesn't melt till 13.5k), so this variance only concerns me if it allows the temp to drop below 9k.
It might be an issue for an automatic-reload breeder like what you're discussing, but for the one I'm running, this desync is NOT an issue. So long as the redstone timer ticks stay within 1-2 seconds of the reactor ticks during a breeding cycle (~5000 ticks), there's no problem.
Also, out of curiosity... how exactly do you plan to swap out things the exact tick it is depleted? As of 1.337 the reactor inventory has been 'fixed', so RP2 tubes will NOT recognize a full reactor as a valid destination. You need at least one tube to the reactor, so the reactor slot must be open for at least that travel duration.