Thanks, but I meant physical friends. I do however, accept you people as my friends. At least my internet friends. I'm trying to not make any bad decisions right now, because my mind is clouded. :\ You know how it is. :\ Even if you aren't my "friend", I don't know know of you enough to call you a asshole. Unless you really are. :\ By the way, some people are just acting happy on the outside, but really they're dying on the inside. It hurts to smile sometimes...
You're still too young to know how "keep smile" sometime hurts. In life come more difficult moments. And other like that.
Moment when you realize you like your father even if he torched you, hurt you while you were little boy and banging your mom.
Moment you know you die one day, but also know, then you DONT WANT die right now. And trust me, you don't want.
You can be greater human, then that "humans" what you met. And you can be big. BUT not because of showing them your differences,
but because you do it for yourself. Try to close your eyes and dream. About future, life what you would like to have. After choose your path,
your way and destiny, be kind and prepare yourseld, then your road to will can be other then you want to have, but...
10% from 100% is more then 100% from nothing.
I can tell you. Im working in very, very bad job. I hate it all the time. Every morning and try to wake up is little big fight with me vs. me.
One part, logical know I really need job. Because I don't want to be homeless, I want to have my computer, hot water and time for code.
Other part, instead of that want to end it, everything. Because if you're nothing, and you're dead, there's no feels. Nothing what can hurt you.
But, every morning I take harder path. Not because harder is allways better, but because its right thing.
And good people are made to do right things. Even if it hurts. Forgive stupid people their stupidity. They dont change and dont know theyre wrong.
But its their fight, other than that you have time to think about. Im saying that, because you do for me thing, what anyone else do...
You believe in me and trust me. Now, in free moments what dont take my family, job or love of my life im doing things to make you proud for your choice.
Please, be patient. Keep tryinga nd keep dreaming. One day, you will have everything you want. Even water, but not as it was in your dream.
Water in bottle. You will have rain. You gain what you dream and what you want, but not always in exactly way you would like to have.
Just remeber, theres no need to be shamed if you dont want keep smile. Better to cry, if you feel it right, my good sir : )